I've been wanting to write about this for a little while now, but I haven't because I just haven't been able to come up with the right words.....
But I've got dinner made, house is clean, boys are both asleep and the laundry I was suppose to be folding now needs another turn in the dryer so I just decided to start writing while I have opportunity and maybe the right words will find their way.
Henrik's birth was an amazing experience for me in so many ways. I have never felt so close to my Father in heaven. I couldn't have imagined the spiritually enlightening experience it would be to be so connected to my body. The euphoria the overtook me as I birthed my sweet little baby boy was amazing. But what I wanted to document is the bond that Henrik's birth brought to my husband and I.
I have never felt more grateful for him. I have never felt so in love with him. I have never felt so connected to him. I have never seen him with these eyes. Henrik's birth changed me and somehow changed us. It is like the sealing that we entered into 4 years ago was renewed and strengthened because of our choice to bring our baby into this world in the loving home that we have worked so hard to create.
As I labored with Henrik I felt Heavenly father make His holy presence known at a very specific time. I'll never forget that moment. I'll never forget the moment I held Henrik for the first time, or the first time we got to introduce Freddy to his little brother. But the blessing that Burgess and I have received in our marriage has come in so many little, seemingly small moments.
It's in all those moments I was so sick and tired during the pregnancy that Burgess took over so many of my responsibilities on himself.
It's in the moments I was feeling sad and depressed that he held me and reassured me.
It's in all those moments that I could feel how much he loves me with out him saying anything at all.
It's in moment that I started pushing Henrik out. I was scared for the first time and he was all of the sudden right by my side and telling me everything I needed to hear.
It was when he burst into tears as he saw our newest son for the first time.
It's in all the nights that he wakes up with Henrik and Freddy in the night to do the feedings, to change the diapers, to do the rocking, to say the prayers over hurting knees or bad dreams.
It's in all those moments he prays over our family and makes sure to start the prayer by taking my hand and end the prayer by giving me a kiss.
It's in all these small and simple moments that we have been sealed closer together. I realize now that we can renew our promises to each other every single time we take the time and we take the love in our hearts to do all of these little things.
I am so grateful for a husband to honestly loves, who willingly serves and who is so completely devoted to his family.
I can't believe God gave him to me.